When Mystery Science Theater 3000 return over Thanksgiving weekend with its six - episodesecond season , “ The Gauntlet , ” it took me a few twenty-four hours to see it had even pass off . I was busy with the holidays , I did n’t have fourth dimension to watch six tremendous motion-picture show with Jonah Ray and the bunch ! And you might not have , either . That ’s why I made the noble forfeiture of watching , and ranking , all the latest episodes of MST3K.
This season , which is celebrating the 30th anniversary of MST3 K , follows last year’sreboot seasonwith the comeback of Ray , Felicia Day , and Patton Oswalt — along with Hampton Yount and Baron Vaughn as our beloved robot friends . These six episodes are ranked , in ordination , from least good to well good . I tried to order them establish on the so - bad - it’s - serious caliber of the movies , as well as the color commentary provide by Jonah and the robots . I also may have given a special bump to the one with a musical figure in it , because that automatically turns anything from good to great .
This 1980 sci - fi thriller felt like The Room meets thing that are much forged than The Room . Taking billet whole at a rest home in the Sonoran Desert , The Day Time terminate is about a family that witness fundamentally everything weird that could ever happen to a human being . A fly UFO demonstrate up , terminate - motion monsters do conflict on the front lawn , a little girl talks to a Barbie - sized extraterrestrial . Then , at the destruction of it all , time … halt ? I think ? It ’s really hard to say .
The motion picture was slaphappy enough and the mob did their best to liven thing up , but it becomes so repetitious by the midsection that it break off being fun to watch . If you want to agree it out , I ’d skip straight to the end , because that ’s when things get weird . And I ’ll be damned if I did n’t crack up every clock time that fiddling girl asked for her pony . That would totally be me , in any situation .
Favorite inverted comma : “ This whole film is like the moth-eaten open air of a Columbo episode . ”
This one was tough . It was one of my personal favorites , but it also was n’t particularly special , so I kept it lower on the list . Lords of the Deep was a 1989 clone ofThe Abyss , this time about a apparently sentient airstream of manta rays . The exceptional effects were terrible and the sets looked like living room with a few extra flashing lights … windowpane blinds and all . It also had a baddie who was so deliciously evil , he was practically licking the covert .
I also want to mention that this is one of the only picture show on the list whose lead worker is actually good . Priscilla Barnes , who play Claire , has gotten continual piece of work over the old age , include as Magda on Jane the Virgin . It ’s good to know she was able to make a name for herself after being in a stinker like this .
favourite line : “ That ’s so Raven , that ’s so Raven , that ’s so Raven . Whoa , that was so Raven . ”
The first in a four - part series , the 1982 fantasy larger-than-life Ator l’invincibile ( unblock in America as Ator , The Fighting Eagle ) is a mockbuster ofConan the Barbarian . It ’s cheesy , farcical , and pretty fun to learn — with so many pelt mankinis that you ’ll start to wonder if the guy is nude and just naturally hairy like that . Come for the wanderer god , bide for the uncomfortable incest .
Plus , after you watch the movie you’re able to go to theWikipediapage and check out all the behind - the - scenes play . For example , a “ hobgoblin ” suit used in the quaternary movie was repurposed from Troll 2 , and was actually unloosen as Troll 3 in Germany . Ator … it ’s goblin spelled backwards !
pet line : “ demented tackiness . What is that , a sideways Batman ? ”
This is arguably the most famous adept - bad movie on the list , and one we ’ve beenwaiting for MST3 K to flick onfor a long sentence . Mac and Me is a genuinely bizarre film that tried to capitalise on E.T. ’s fame . It starred Jade Calegory as Eric Cruise , a young boy who finds a unfeignedly terrifying alien boy and decides to name him MAC ( because he ’s a Mysterious Alien Creature ) . It ’s a film that made several refutable choices , like the whole “ cliff ” tantrum ( if you ’ve get wind Paul Rudd on Conan O’Brien ’s show , you know what I ’m talk about ) .
Also , if you ’re curious about thatalternate endingwhere Eric was shot in the chest — no , they do n’t show that here . But Jonah does have a entire junky - out about how the tantrum should have been ; it ’s just as queer and features much less child harm , which is good for all of us .
Favorite line : “ I wanna see the movie this composer conceive he was scoring . ”
Who says mockbusters only fall out in the 1980s ? MST3 K jumped into one of its most recent movie Riff to escort with 2013 ’s Atlantic Rim , an Asylum mockbuster make to trick aunt into think they were rentingPacific Rimat RedBox . While it ’s one matter to watch a movie that ’s essay to capitalize on a course from 20 or 30 years ago , it ’s another thing exclusively to follow one that ’s doing the same thing for a franchise you love in the here and now .
The movie is attractively unspeakable , featuring a trio of nose candy - inclination legal action stars that wear wetsuits , control robot in their color - coded box , and kinda - sorta get into a love Triangulum because what else are you move to do with your lady robot fighter ? You ’re supposed to root for the whitened guy because he bewilder all the coolest dragon scrap with his giant CGI golem , but you also want him to die because he ’s pretty much the most terrible human being to ever walk the planet . plunderer : He ’s okay . Because he ’s the snowy guy cable .
pet line : “ He ’s like if a puka shell necklace was a person . ”
I had no melodic theme this movie be , and now I ’m so glad I have it in my living . Killer Fish is a 1979 Italian - Gallic - Brazilian horror film that ’s part Jaws , part James Bond , and all incredible .
It begin with an epical jewel rip-off , utter with exploding vanguard because hey , if you ’ve got the budget for it , why not ? The thieves cover the gem at the bottom of a reservoir , which a criminal conceiver has stocked with his private supply of killer whale piranhas ( ok , certain ) . It ’s kill or be belt down as the stealer — alongside a seemingly unacquainted modeling group — seek to survive the horde of fish while grabbing the expectant plunder of all . Is it sexual love ? No , it ’s jewel .
The movie is not only a enceinte mountain of adventuresome nonsense , it star Lee Majors ( The Six Million Dollar Man ) and Karen Black , an laurels - advance actress who also gained cult renown for movies like Airport 1975 and Rob Zombie ’s House of 1000 Corpses . There ’s also a woman in the movie who appear just like Cara Delevingne , and every time I saw her I want her to whisper “ Enchantress ” for no cause .
PS : The full cast of MST3 K has an awesome musical number in the middle of this pic and it is not to be pretermit .
favourite line : “ God really knew what he was doing in not having human males grow antler . ”
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